Thursday, July 29, 2004

In Too Deep

I believe in love at first sight
Happens to me half a dozen times a day
I believe in fairy tales but
Forgot to leave a trail of crumbs to find my way

I'm in too deep
I'm on my way
I'm on my knees
And I'm here to stay

I've seen my share of dragons in my day
Slain a few Goliaths also
But you know when shadows come my way
I just run as fast as I go

I'm in too deep
I run away
Flat on my back
And I'm here...

When you are an emperor like me
How you look is so important
Tried to hide by putting on new clothes
But I know you saw right through it

I just want to run away today
Why can't I be the one to speak it
But thoughts of you keep pulling me right back
The treasures for the one who seeks it

I'm in too deep
I run away
Fall on my back
And I'm here to say
I'm in too deep
I'm on my way
Down on my knee
And I'm here to stay


Tuesday, July 06, 2004

Pragmatic

Pragmatic (May 9th, 2004 – 6:00am – Stuttgart, Germany)


The German people are very pragmatic.

As I wander the streets of Germany and view the 200 year old houses with fresh paint jobs and notice not one pot-hole or scrap of paper on the street… I realize more of who these people are and what they are about.

Since the end of WWII the people of Deutschland have rebuilt from rubble to become a world power again. In a little over 50 years this land has been formed and reformed by the hard work of this stout-hearted group. No matter how much evil occurred here, spawned by Hitler and his thugs, you cannot help but admire the others in this nation if for nothing more than their work ethic.

Germans sure know how to perfect things… The design of their cars, microphones, cities and highways… these people take an idea and run with it! Their logical approach and attention to detail and design are outstanding.

But where are the German breakthroughs? They know how to run with an idea, but haven’t had an original thought since Lederhosen (and I think they stole that one from the Romans)… Leave it to the sloppy, tattooed, fat, loud Americans to come up with electricity, the automobile, television, the airplane, peanut butter, light bulbs, rock n’ roll, and Pauly Shore.

Practicality has its place. But there is something about being a little looser and more free that makes for great original thought… I just wish I knew how to perfect my idea for the Slurpy waterbed!

Aunt Lina

Frau Alten Michelstadt, Germany (May 15th, 2004)

“Frau Alten” they call her...
This 83 year old woman is my ‘Aunt Lina’… my father’s aunt… his mother’s only sister.

She was a school teacher in a little town in Germany called Michelstadt, her home now for more than 60 years. Many of the leaders in her town were once her pupils and sat in her class from grade 1 to 8.

Today, with eyes full of life and a face full of years, she is still a teacher: patiently teacher me German, telling story after hilarious story of the history of our family, and spending time with many people from the town as they talk to her at a restaurant or on the street.

Lina is a firecracker! She reminds me of… and please excuse the comparison because I mean this in the most loving and respectful way, but she reminds me of… Yoda. Her wrinkled face with her kinds eyes full of sparkle recount a sage wisdom that an 800 year old Jedi master might have. Even her cane, although now a necessity, does not reflect the true essence of the woman holding it. She does not seem frail, but strong in some way.

My aunt Lina… She is a woman that has lived many years. She lived through WWII literally. She has seen her share of heartache and still loves and greets each day with open arms. To see her smile at a bowl of strawberries (‘Erdbeeren’ she calls them) makes you begin to see life with her child-like fascination.

Lina was also a musician. She was the organist for her local Catholic church for 60 years. She started playing for the church at age 10. Last night she told us about a Saturday night that she went dancing (the waltz) with a bunch of friends and didn’t get home until 6:30am… When they got home they changed clothes and went to church! Reminds me of some of my Sunday mornings… By the way, my great grandfather didn’t care that she was out so late because he was playing in the band…

Tomorrow we are going to Frankfurt to take a tour of the Rhein River. At a restaurant called Drei Hassen in Michelstadt next to the Rathaus tonight, Lina began to tell us the story of Loreley who “catches fisherman” with her long blonde hair and her beautiful voice. Lina said that Loreley sits up high on a hill near the Rhein and sings her song. And as she sings, she mesmerizes the fisherman and they drown… And as Lina told this story with her 83 year old voice she began to sing the Loreley song softly and tenderly like a mother to her child… I didn’t want it to end.

Lina also told my father about the last time she saw him in Germany… It was at Wurzburg and her father and mother handed him through the window of a train to my grand parents as they were leaving for America. Lina said that my great grandmother could not look at any of my father’s toys or clothes for months because it made her cry. “She missed you. We all missed you very, very much”… And with those words I, for the first time, felt a connection to my great grandparents. I finally understood just a little of the loss that they must have felt to be cut off from their blood for the rest of their lives. I never knew them. My father only saw them once after that day, when he was 13. “But so goes life”, Lina says... And again she is teaching me something.

Monday, July 05, 2004

The Landscape Around Here...

The landscape of my face has changed... Scratching my cheek makes the sound of rustling whiskers almost immediately after a shave.

My eyes in the morning, no longer just puffy from slumber, are now showing fatigue. There are even well-earned wrinkles that sign my face with "Life was here", "Worry 1998", "Broken Heart + Loneliness" and "Sleepless Night Tour 2003"... like the underside of a bunkbed at summer camp.

Sometimes my face's age is underestimated... The purr of contentment and the shine of a smile, like a fresh coat of paint, skews the guess down a few years. But I see the months piled on and the days fading.

When a guitar has a new set of strings it sounds bright, every overtone can be heard. The strings seem to shine in the ears. But after being played, getting a bit dirty and worn in, the sound mellows. And for a while those strings sound more rich and full then any new strings could.

I prefer that rich, mellow tone to the shimmer of new strings because that sound is earned... New strings always sound new no matter how cheap they were. But not all old strings last long enough or are made with enough care to sound so rich... May the quality of my character be like that... And may my face not hide it.